“A bit heartbreaking just because I thought I’d figured it out” – Kyrgios
The Australian said he does not know if he will be able to play Miami but remains hopeful
Nick Kyrgios, Indian Wells 2025
Image Credit: Jayne Kamin-Oncea-Imagn Images/Sipa USA/SIPA
There have been many times during Nick Kyrgios‘ career when the Australian has been accused of not caring enough about tennis. But anyone who saw Kyrgios break down in tears as he was forced to retire during his first round match at the BNP Paribas Open in Indian Wells on Thursday, could see just how much the sport means to him.
Kyrgios was trailing Dutchman Botic van de Zandschulp 7-6, 3-0 when he called for the trainer to look at his wrist, for which he underwent a reconstruction surgery in 2023. The 29-year-old then broke down in tears as he went over to shake his opponent’s hand and call it a day.
“I want to go out there and I want to compete. When I had the surgery 18 months ago, if I really didn’t want to play, I didn’t have to rehab, I didn’t have to try and get back on the court,” Kyrgios told the media on Thursday. “I want to play. I knew I was going to be in discomfort tonight after two days ago but I took the court. It’s brutal, especially because I was having such a good year. I think that’s what is painful for me. And I think the coach I’m here with this week, my physio, I keep talking about that year, and it’s, like, you can’t expect that anymore. That’s I think for me what’s a bit heartbreaking just because I thought I’d figured it out.”
I guess this process has been probably one of the biggest challenges I’ve faced in my life.
Kyrgios, who reached the Wimbledon final and lost to Novak Djokovic in 2022, said he still struggles to come to terms with just how far he is from his best level.
“I had an amazing season, literally knocking on the door of a Grand Slam, and then you just get pulled right back, and now you’re gonna start from — I literally don’t have a ranking at the moment, was out for one-and-a-half years, and I’m trying to work my way back. The injury was not ideal. But I think it’s hard for me to kind of not think about how good I was playing, like and then… Yeah, it’s brutal.”
“I guess this process has been probably one of the biggest challenges I’ve faced in my life. Reality, it’s not too bad, but for my tennis career, it’s by far the biggest. Yeah, just the amount of work that goes in when I go back home or when I’m not playing, it’s not fun. I know that I can’t really be doing any more to try and get back and play. It’s just like the process of, even if I lose that match, I don’t want to — like, I don’t mind losing if I don’t feel, you know — I know it’s going to be uncomfortable but I don’t want to feel the pain I was feeling. I’m okay to lose a match. I’ve lost matches in my career many times.”
Kyrgios said he does not know when he would be able to play next, especially given that no one in the sport has undergone wrist reconstruction surgery and then come back to play at the top level.
“I just went straight to the locker room and iced it. I’ll try and do all the right things to settle it down. But look, like, no one in the sport has had a wrist reconstruction and tried to play after that. There’s been players that have had wrist surgeries and nowhere near as bad as what I had,” the Australian added. “It would be nice if someone had this injury prior if I could just go there and ask them, okay, these are setbacks you were having. There’s really no — like, it’s all an experiment at this point. I was told I was arguably maybe not ever playing tennis again. I feel I’m like right there, I feel like I can compete.
“I don’t know. I’ll just keep looking forward and try and do the right thing. Obviously the time frame of Miami is not ideal, but, you know, I was scheduled to play that, so I will see how my wrist responds. And if not Miami, I will keep looking forward. I can’t keep looking back and being disappointed. Otherwise I don’t know how much enjoyment I will have in that.”
